The Americans

Recently I drove through a part of the United States with my fiance. We drove through Indiana, Illinois, Minnesota, Wisconsin, and North Dakota. For the most part, the Midwest looks a lot like Alberta, where I live. There are some rolling hills, some forests, some prairie and some civilization.

But there is something different. Something that - frankly - scares me. Whenever we would stop somewhere I would look at the people around us and marvel that there was nothing different from them than from us. Well, there were a few things. There are more Hispanic people in the US and more Asian people here in Canada. The washrooms were dirtier at the restaurants I stopped at... and speaking of those... I have never been talked to in the washrooms as much in the Canada as I was in the US.

But I was a little scared. These were AMERICANS. Their country has a large ARMY that would protect them. It has a Might Makes Right mentality and a Capitalistic drive. My country is soft and squishy where theirs is ripped and toned. (Well, maybe not so much, I did notice that people were a bit heavier down there... but then again the percentage is probably the same - it's just they have ten times more people)

And the whole time I kept thinking... what would they do if they found out I was *gasp* Canadian? Because then I'd have to get all defensive and explain that we're not ALL liberals and we don't ALL say 'eh' and they would answer the way MOST answer... with laughter in their voices.

Is Canada that... funny?

I have learned one thing though... Canada is much colder. Don't laugh, I know what you are thinking. But the middle of winter is cold whether you are in Indiana or Alberta. However, the summer is where you will notice the difference.

This past week, in the middle of August, we had a frost warning at night. FROST. In AUGUST. That is not funny.

This is where I sigh heavily...

I will be out of town Sept 15 - 18. I asked my mother long ago to watch my son while I was out of town... working and not cavorting, I might add... and she said yes. I know I asked her via email and of course I recently deleted my sent emails because this stupid email program get's overloaded if I keep too many things in it... But I KNOW I asked her and I KNOW she said yes.

Now apparently she will not be in town.

HEAVY SIGH.

Up and running!

So it was a month ago that I posted, huh?

Well the news has been this: it was RAINING in Calgary. Torrential downpous, swollen rivers and people drowning type rain. So no, I did not go running.

Then was vacation time in the states. In Indiana and the other Midwestern and North Central states it was FREAKING HOT so I did not run.

But the other day, I did run. Unfortunately I forgot that whole DRINK WATER thing again and realized 15 minutes into it that all I'd consumed since I'd woken up six hours earlier was two cups of coffee. Stoopid, stoopid, stoopid.

Will do better this weekend!

Why I'm not Running...

Because it's FLOODING in Calgary.

I was supposed to go for a run tomorrow at Fort Calgary. Which is right next to the river... but they are evacuating the communities by the river... so no running... unless it's away from the river.

I suck

I admit it... it's been a very busy week, I've been out of town for about 4 days.

It's sunny and beautiful and I forgot my running clothes at home.

I suck!

I am still planning on the Father's Day 5K (June 19th) though, so there's hope for me yet!

I felt a little freaked out a couple of weeks ago. There was a jogger in Canmore, Alberta who was killed by a bear and one of my first thoughts was the title of this blog... I kept thinking, I guess there was something chasing her! Though I can't imagine why you would jog in that area without bear spray... it's THEIR domain, isn't it? Just because we put up some houses and a few ski lifts doesn't change that.

Rain, Rain, Go Away...

No, I haven't been running. It has been raining.

I know, I know, it's not like I can't run in the rain. But c'mon! I don't love it THAT much just yet! Although I do think about it a lot... I wonder how soon until I can run for a half an hour....

A lot sooner if it would just quit raining!

Warning: Do not run while grumpy

Not such a great run today.

1. Was Grumpy because boyfriend forgot run date. (Forgave him because he has a very sore neck after wrestling with my three year old child. Questioning boyfriends suitability as wrestling partner for Super Boy)

2. Became Grumpier when I forgot my waterbottle and it was hot in the car.

3. Grumpier still when I jogged past crazy grandmother-woman feeding the geese NOT TEN FEET from the DON'T FEED GEESE sign.

4. Definitely hit Grumpy low when I realized running was feeling like crap because I had not consumed enough water. This morning I drank a big glass of water (because of course I had not hydrated since bed time, nine hours earlier, so it seems likely that my body would need water by morning) but since that time I had only had two cups of coffee. Coffee is not really water. With my uneducated logic, coffee is a diuretic therefore it stands to reason that one of its jobs is to remove water from my body.

Strangely enough I made the loop in 14 minutes dispite the fact that I ran/walked it. But I'm chalking it up to some quick sprints I did at the end.

By quick sprints I mean I RAN ten steps, caught my breath, RAN ten steps... la la la. Not fun, but great release for grumpiness.

Now, for lunch, I am eating green beans and left over steak and I do not feel guilty for taking out of the fridge this morning and leaving boyfriend to fend for himself at lunch.

First RUNNING CLUB

For some reason it was easier today.

I was leery. Or, rather, my thighs were leery. So were my calves.

I did not run as long - consecutively - but I ran a loop at a local park. It looked long on the board, but it only took 15 minutes. Mentally this was much easier as for most of the run I could look over across the lake at the finish line. The park is set up as a series of paths around a couple of man-made lakes and part of it goes right along side the river. It's a very nice park - there are Canada Geese and robins and all sorts of happy creatures.

(Also goose-poop to avoid, you gotta love nature)

The club was supposed to meet up, but I arrived early and ran by myself. When I got back the group was there... so me being the 'keener' that I now am, I went again. But I was not nearly as successful as the first time around. This time it was a definite run-walk loop.

So I'm figgerin' that I should continue to run the first loop and run-walk the second until some point in my life I can run two loops. At that point I will surely have a butt to bounce a quarter off of and my thighs will be made of steel and not the jello that they currently consist of.

Not so sure if I want to keep running with the running club. I like running with the boyfriend much better. He cares about how far I go and how hard I push myself.

I'm considering running in the Deerfoot Run here in Calgary because it is only 5K and because "finish line photos will be taken." That rocks most of all!

The Day After the First Day

I did not run today.

I did not walk today.

I hobbled like an old woman holding a large watermellon between her knees. I would love to have the ache of running rather than the ache of the day after.

Must keep going to avoid this pain!

Tomorrow is the first day of the Running Club at work. I can do this.

The First Run

My first thought, looking down at my feet, is that stretching upwards from them are my jiggly white thighs that look like very whale-like and... well, white. Here's hoping they get tanned so I no longer cause motorists to veer of course from their blinding white-ness. It's a gorgeous morning, bright and warm. Not hot. But then again it's Canada and it's May, and it does not get hot until July.

The boyfriend came with me. Before I go any further let me explan that the boyfriend was in the army for a long time. He has run when he doesn't want to run and pushed himself. So he's going to be playing the part of the 'coach'.

"There is only one rule. Don't stop. You can slow down, but you cannot walk." Now he tells me.

After the first five minutes I was thinking about walking. Thinking how nice it would be to feel the release and just walk instead of this thudding pain. But not pain really. Just an ache like an engine that's not warmed up, which is, I suppose, the case.

"Lean back and keep kicking your legs forward." This is the man I want to marry?

He wants me to lead but I don't want to. He doesn't know where he's going but I don't care there is no way on this green earth that I am going to run in front of him so that he can contemplate the rubbery bouncing of my ass.

No, I much prefer to be behind where I can struggle to maintain steady breathing so I don't sound like I am dying. I still want to walk.

"Walking is for fat chicks and old people." That's ok, I think being a fat chick is ok Mr. Army. But strangely enough this is slightly motivating in an I-hate-you sort of way. It's ok to hate this. No one but a crazy person would love this.

We jog (because this is too slow to be running but not slow enough to be fat-chick-pace) past some garage sales and I image them thinking 'bloody keeners' in the exact same tone that I think that whenever I see a runner. I wonder if they have ever run before, but the stylish muu-muu that the woman is wearing me makes me lean towards no.

I voice my vote for the 'run 10, walk 1' school of training. Actually, he says that comes from JOG 10, RUN 1.

I don't like that way either. But I keep going. I'd like to write that by this point I think running is fun. That it is exhilirating and freeing and the wind is blowing through my hair and I'm all Pheobe about it. But I am not. No, I am not. I still do not like it.

"Pain is a weakness that is leaving your body." Now that is funny. I'm sure someone yelled that at him once and I'm happy that he just leans over and whispers it to me. I am starting to like having Mr. Army as a coach. Because I could believe in that. So I think about that and I feel that ache and imagine it leaving my body. Cool.

I've never run with anyone before. Never let someone see me trying to do something beyond my reach. Because right now running effectively and 'prettily' is very outside my reach. I run jiggly and gaspy and scare small dogs.

I have worn a watch, I don't think I'll do this again because I keep looking at it when only minutes have gone by and that is more painful than the running itself.

We get stuck at a light and I am feeling dizzy. I don't want to say anything but I really am dizzy, I wobble a bit and want to sit down. We cross the street and I make it a couple of more minutes before saying "I don't care, I need to walk. You run ahead." He doesn't, he walks with me and we head home.

I only ran for 20 minutes. I could lie and say I ran longer, but what's the point of this if I am not honest about it. Twenty minutes is not long. But then again, I've never run for 20 minutes in a row. Ever.

When I am home I think about what I've done and it's a mixture of pride and disappointment. I am proud that I did something and disappointed that I could not do more. But it is a starting point. Stay tuned.